What it has done is make me realise how much I appreciate my friends – including this amazing blog community. I thank God for you and for what He is showing me of Himself through your care. It’s been lovely – but also upsetting – even more than the appointment itself.
I’m used to thinking that strength means keeping stuff to myself. If you can give things to people, then they gotta accept you, right? Because they owe you. But this grace business is different; like theft. It puts me at a disadvantage: I didn’t earn it, I don’t deserve it and I’m not sure how to receive it – at least, not without feeling complicated-up.
Something there is about sharing a fear, that also shrinks it.
Something there is about acknowledging weakness, that makes you strong.
Something there is about the love of friends and strangers, that is scarier and more overwhelming than a dodgy mole.
Something there is about grace that bursts the banks of all we know.
Something there is about the God who shines brightest in the dark.