Glen’s away at the moment, so I’m seeking solace in the arms of another man.  He’s called Mr Hesse and I picked him up in the library. Herman’s not here in person, but he wrote some stonking fairy stories. Proper ones: with giants and goblins and elves and all the rest. I can hardly put ‘em down. All of life is here. Unrequited love. Family feuds. Friendships and quarrels.   Anger and malice and grief and greed. The beauty who can’t get out of bed. (Depression? Or just too many late nights?) Fashion victims with crystal ... Read More

Can an addict ever be fully recovered? Are there some slaveries that will never fully recede, no matter how hard you fight them? Can your heart and thinking change as well as your behaviour? Or are you destined to remain  a non-practising version of the same old model? … Most of the literature I’ve read on addiction says this:  they never really go away – you just get better at managing them. For some people this is the rational voice of realism: a reminder that no-one is beyond temptation – especially in a familiar ... Read More

I wish we got training on how to do people. A little map that steers you through social minefields and tells you things like How To Start A Conversation, When To Let The Matter Drop, Avoiding Conversational Lulls and Not Making That Clicky Noise With Your Tongue. An app that plays soothing music during awkward silences.  That tells you when you’ve got spinach in your teeth or are standing too close. Some people seem to know these things automatically.  I’m guessing they’re the same ones who flushed my head down the toilet at school. ... Read More

I never thought I’d have anything in common with James Cameron.  The man who brought us ‘Titanic: the movie’ and – worse still – a song that goes on and on and on and – (Stop! Make it stop! My ears are BLEEDING) You get the gist. But – Celine Dion aside – it turns out that we think in similar categories.  Here’s what he says; ‘People call me a perfectionist, but I’m not.  I’m a rightist: I do something until it’s right, and then I move on to the next ... Read More

It might be surprising to know, but I was a pastor in a church for almost 5 years and I have to say, today, I have never felt spiritually lower. I’m not having a crisis of faith. I know Jesus is Lord, I know Jesus is the Son of God; I can declare loudly that he is coming and he is King. But he has become more of an acquaintance than a friend. I think that has happened because I have lost sight of freedom. We are told that we live in a free society. Freedom is supposed to bring happiness. But if that’s true, then why am I – and others ... Read More

Next week I’m speaking at a conference  entitled ‘Beautiful‘. When you hear that word, what springs to mind?  A sunset? A film star? A family member or a friend? Would you ever apply it to yourself? I’m guessing the answer is a resounding ‘no’. In fact, I’d go further.  I wonder if just the idea of being referred to in this way makes you laugh. - Beautiful?  Me?  You must be Joking. Except that, it’s not  funny.  The opposite.  When you try to think of yourself as ‘beautiful’, ... Read More

A bucket list, as I’m sure you know, is a list of things you’d like to do before you die (or ‘hit the bucket’).  Here’s some of mine;   road trip with my hubby take communion with my family perform ‘Goldfinger’ wearing Shirley Bassey wig and all-in-one gold lame go to La Tomatina festival in Spain tell my old Sunday school teacher how imp0rtant he was to me have a baby put my hand print in wet concrete walk on the grass change someone’s life milk a cow memorise the book of Romans write and ... Read More

Here’s a line from one of my favourite poets, Denise Riley: ‘the eyes of the girls are awash with violets pansies are flowering under their tongues they are grouped by the edge of the waves and are anxious to swim and each one is on fire with a passion to achieve herself.’ This passion – to achieve oneself – is something that burns within us all, though I suspect teenage girls feel it most intensely. It’s fed by our longings, our fears and our culture.  But perhaps it’s in us as well, right from the ... Read More

Are diets really a modern phenomenon? Or just an age-old expression of our need to worship -whether at the supermarket or the mirror? In her book, ‘Calories and Corsets’ Louise Foxcroft argues that ‘contemporary’ diets such as Atkins, are nothing of the kind.  She gives the example of the Hay diet, which was popular at the start of the early 20thc.  Given a few tweaks, this became the Beverly Hills diet of the 1980s.  Similarly, Atkins has been given a ‘new’ spin as the ‘Dukan’ diet – ... Read More

Source: Dimitris Polychroniadis: http://www.behance.net/gallery/Small-Lives-in-Jars/918324 What does a small life look like? Hedged in by habits, startled by sudden movements. Unobtrusive. Safe. No risks and no surprises.  Head down, stay the course.  Don’t stick your neck out.  Don’t aim too high.  Don’t try in case you fail. Go with the majority. Practise religion. Keep the rules. Talk of God and not Christ. Keep it light. Don’t be so serious.   Soundbites not mouthfuls. Headlines, not analysis. Box sets, not ... Read More