Gritty Love

By February 22, 2017 Blog

Real love is not in the grand gestures, the dazzling diamond or the flourish of flowers. It’s not a stunning white dress a first dance or a heart carved into wood. Real love is not wet-eyed sentiment; a puppy or a perfect child. It’s messy and painful; not scented or neat. Real love is wiping up Weetabix and changing dirty sheets. It’s a series of tiny moments a hand on the shoulder serving, even when you’re tired It’s a smile – but also a …Read More

Twelve Years a (Love) Slave

By May 23, 2015 Blog

Twelve years ago tomorrow, Glen and I tied the knot. It was a glorious day, filled with laughter and love. The honeymoon was just as I’d dreamed – and after our return, it only got better. The longer we spent in each other’s company, the more we fell in love. It was so effortless; like two pieces slotting into a whole. In Glen’s arms, I found myself and finally blossomed into the woman I’d always longed to be. Living together was a total joy and felt like second …Read More

Unconditional

By May 18, 2015 Blog

I’ve been talking to some friends about love. One who’s been single for many years, is now in a relationship. The other, who’s been childless for many years, has just had a wee boy. Both are rejoicing.  But both say this: ‘It’s wonderful – but it doesn’t fix you.’   The longed-for family.  The partner you’ve always dreamed of. When it comes to love, this is the best that the world can offer. And it’s wonderful – but it doesn’t …Read More

Real Love?

By February 2, 2015 Blog

My marriage is in trouble. I know we’ve had our wobbles in the past.  But this week, I realised that the situation is far worse than I’d imagined. This week, I read an article entitled, “Love – How to know it’s the Real Deal”. And – if what it says is true – then Glen and I don’t love each other. And maybe we never did. Exhibit 1: “The moment we met, I knew. I saw him and tingled from head to …Read More

Spot the Difference

By August 28, 2014 Blog

Watch a perfume ad. Or read a magazine. How do you know when you’re in love? You can’t bear to be without them.  They complete you.  They get you – when no-one else does.  Your passions are their passions. When you’re together, nothing else matters.  You can’t eat or sleep or think of anyone else.   They’re like no-one else you’ve ever met. You can’t believe how much they know about you and how much they think of you. Now. …Read More

Crazy Love

By June 11, 2014 Blog

What does it mean to love? I’d always pictured it as a big strawberry-scented pink bubble, that envelopes you in warm feelings and then sweeps you along. You can’t resist it; and when it happens, it makes everything simple. But when I think about the people I love and the relationships we have, they’re definitely not pink. On many occasions, loving others seems not just resistible, but impossible. There’s all kinds of feelings in there: and they’re complicated instead of simple. …Read More

3 mins on Love (updated!)

By March 30, 2014 Blog

Here’s a wee interview I did with BBC radio on ‘love’ (airing today as part of their Lent series). I’ve updated it so you can listen direct instead of downloading – sorry if this has been tricky. … Mum was very excited (but I think she got it mixed up with the Archers and I haven’t broken it to her yet).                                       …Read More

The Creepy Intimacy We All Want

By February 13, 2014 Blog

‘The crowning ambition in my life is to be able to be with another person.  That’s all we all want.  We say we want world peace, but in truth we want to be totally exposed in front of someone who says, ‘Actually, you’re all right.’ The creepy intimacy of really knowing someone and them really knowing me…I would be incredibly sad if I got to the end of my days and didn’t have that.” (Sue Perkins, Interview with The Times, …Read More

Ways To Say I Love You (Without Buying A Card)

By February 12, 2014 Blog

Right.  Valentine’s.  We’re going to look at it very briefly and then never speak of it again. Think of it as pre-emptive strike: it’s too dangerous to wait till Friday. Love is not a matching set of bra and knickers or a plastic rose.  Nor is it the exclusive preserve of hot young lovers. It’s emptying the bins as much as a violins. And there are 364 other days in which to show it. So.  Here’s some ways to tell …Read More

Just The Tonic

By December 16, 2013 Blog

I’ve got a bit of a lurgy. Sitting in the doctor’s surgery today, I was leafing through magazines. The doctor didn’t give me any meds, but this story from an old copy of ‘Yours’, did the same job: It’s the story of a friendship between Paula, a 30 year-old single Christian, and Ann, who she met through church. Ann had been brought up in foster care and hadn’t had an easy life. Paula realised she needed a good friend and …Read More