Take That, Gary

By September 30, 2012 Blog

Last night I dreamt of Gary Barlow. In the dream, Gary was upset.  Not only had he discovered a red M+M among the green ones – he was trapped in a glasscaseofemotion with a load of kids who had Great Energy but couldn’t sing. Poor Gary lost it and stormed backstage to give the auditionees a little piece of his mind. ‘Pull it together you idiots. Sing like you mean it. AND MAKE ME CRY’. Well. You can understand his concerns – but …Read More

What’s A Woman?

By September 29, 2012 Blog

What makes A Woman? It’s a genuine question – and I don’t have an answer; nor for that matter, an agenda, (theological or otherwise). But my head hurts from trying to make sense of it. And I’d love to know what you think. I’ve tried to work it out myself.  Even done some reading. It goes without saying, that the women’s glossies are a pile of poop. The fashion ones tell you that it’s Dior or death.  The ‘healthy’ ones urge …Read More

Things That Make Me Angry

By September 28, 2012 Blog

being told I’m angry when I want to change but can’t romantic comedies bullying friends weeping over their ugliness, when all I can see is beauty salt and vinegar crisps in green packets (green is cheese and onion.  Blue is salt and vinegar.  Why are you messing with us?) being spammed with aids for weight loss sultanas in curries. (fruit – good.  Curry – good.  Fruit + curry: WRONG) not knowing how I feel and/or knowing how I feel but not being …Read More

Friendship 101

By September 26, 2012 Blog

They teach you a lot of useful things at school. How to tell a French person that you’re lost. Not to date Henry VIII. The difference between a stalactite and stalagmite (‘tights come down’). New towns and volcanoes. Prime numbers and bunsen burners. And last, but not least; the correct way to put a condom on a cucumber, (I went to a girl’s school and this, my friends, was sex ed). What they don’t teach you however, is how to make friends. They don’t …Read More

The Naked and Insulted God

By September 25, 2012 Blog

It’s okay for me to criticise my family – but if anyone else does, They’re Going Down. You see, nothing hurts like having a loved one insulted.  If someone questions our taste in music or ice-cream, it’s bad enough…but step closer to the things we love, or even worship – and you’re playing with fire. We’ve seen this already in the last few days, following the release of a film in the US that denigrates the prophet Mohammed.  In Pakistan …Read More

Thanks God, That’ll Be All.

By September 24, 2012 Blog

It’s okay for God to make suggestions. Emma, you might want to pick up the Bible more.  Maybe read outside the Psalms.  It’s okay for Him to challenge me on a couple of areas. Talk to me. What’s with the shoe stockpile?   However. There’s a limit – a point where God needs to cut me some slack and stop interfering. … Why does He keep prodding the same old wounds? The soft flesh that splits and bleeds at the touch? Why do …Read More


By September 23, 2012 Blog

It’s hard not to imagine that God hides behind the sofa when He sees me coming. After all, I’ve run from Him and lied to Him and  yelled at Him and taken His stuff but pushed Him away. The truth however, is a little different: ‘… while I was still a long way off, my father saw me and was filled with compassion for me; he ran to me, his daughter, threw his arms around me and kissed me’. Luke 15:20b How does God feel when …Read More

Stranger Danger

By September 22, 2012 Blog

This morning we were teaching a group of 11-14s on the issue of ‘identity’.    I was a little nervous. The last time I spoke to the same age-group, I was talking about my granny dying when one of the kids took a call on his mobile, yawned and said ‘yeah boring: hopefully she’ll be done soon’. Thankfully, the young people today were lovely. But it made me think about what sorts of people I find most intimidating, and why. In terms of scariness (0 …Read More


By September 21, 2012 Blog

Thanks so much to those of you who have been praying for and encouraging us, especially with today’s Wewantohaveababybutlookslikeweneedhelp appt. It’s been a tough day.  Rattling of skeletons for me, what with the doctors and being poked and scraped and talking about – y’know, Lady Business. Equally difficult for Glen – for different reasons. More tests to come and some challenges for the future. No guarantees. Except this – we know that the Lord will help us at every stage. And whilst, there have been a few …Read More

Bad Brain

By September 20, 2012 Blog

The brain’s a funny thing. It tells you all kinds of weird stuff that just ain’t true.  Mine, anyway. But before you can nod and say, ‘Brain, I’m wise to your tricks’, it’s convinced you that the weird stuff IS true and it’s the world/other people/the government/your partner/Simon Cowell that’s bonkers. Example.  I’m running late.  I’ve tried on six different outfits, each worse than the last.  Do I cut my losses and face up to the fact that the right outfit  will not make …Read More