Myths about OCD

By January 30, 2014 Blog

1. you can spot someone with OCD. No – for some folks it might be obvious, (eg; handwashing or repetitive actions).  But often it’s internal; for example, worrying if you’re going to harm someone or write something blasphemous. Obsessions and rituals go way beyond checking things and handwashing. Just because you collect stamps does not mean you have OCD. 2. folks with OCD are always super-organised and tidy. Germ phobia can be one expression of it, but that’s not the …Read More

Life and Death

By January 30, 2014 Blog

In yesterday’s post, I touched on the issue of suicide.  Here are a few of the comments: and a powerful reminder of how complex and painful this issue can be: “As a youth worker I have often begged troubled young souls to stay on the planet long enough to access help, talk things through, see life improve. Most have. Some haven’t. Several close friends and family members have taken their own lives and dozens of suicides have taken place locally: …Read More


By January 29, 2014 Blog

“Suicide is the greatest of human freedoms, underwriting all the others, for it gives us the possibility of defying every thing and every one there is. The possibility of suicide is what makes life voluntary and each new day an act of will. No wonder the faith community gnash their teeth at suicide. God Himself, if He existed, would gnash His teeth at suicide: the supreme act of defiance, the final rasberry. The knowledge that I’m here by choice, that …Read More

Should Do Better?

By January 28, 2014 Blog

I was going to write a ‘Christian’ bucket list today.  There were lots of good ideas in it: Use the following: ‘I’m sorry’.  ‘I don’t know’. ‘I was wrong’. Be the Real person in your small group. Read the Bible more and pray more. Build a bunker for the rapture. (No biblical warrant but I think it would be fun). I had more.  Some of them were Really Godly. You’d have been impressed, and hopefully, scared. But when I read the list …Read More

Fathers and God

By January 27, 2014 Blog

“I just wish I could understand my father” – Michael Jackson Here’s a question.  When do you leave your parents behind?  When you become a teenager?  When you leave home?  When you start a family of your own?  When they die? Our parents shape our lives – for better or worse. I’m not sure we ever lose the desire to please them. We look to them to tell us who we are – and who we could be. But like us, they’re …Read More

View from the Couch

By January 24, 2014 Blog

What are the issues as churches that we need to be addressing? How have our worries changed – and who do we go for answers and help? In many cases, therapists are the new priests – and what we talk about on the couch is what we also carry into our pews. From relationship breakdown and body dysmorphia to male stress, internet porn addiction to domestic overload, here’s what therapists (interviewed in The Guardian newspaper), describe as the big issues …Read More

New Name, New Face

By January 23, 2014 Blog

You’ve probably spotted that the blog’s had a face-lift. It’s the same old rantings, but hopefully a bit easier to read and navigate.  Big thanks to The Amazing Hugh Bo for all his patience and hard work. You’re a blog legend, Hugh. I’ve fought tooth and nail to retain the wood background, which I’m told is dated and naff and all sorts of wrong.  (There’s apparently a reason you don’t see it on other blogs). But I think I like it. …Read More

Yes! NO. Maybe.

By January 22, 2014 Blog

Before I developed anorexia, I had a habit of saying ‘yes’ to everything and everyone.  It wasn’t kindness or self-sacrifice – it was an attempt to get people to approve of me.  But it went beyond other people.   More than wanting to be as good as others, I wanted to be better. I wanted to prove that I was worthwhile and special and that life wasn’t as confusing and random as it felt. To take control, I invented a system of …Read More

Faces to Names

By January 21, 2014 Blog

I’ll never forget when granny went into residential care. We wanted her to stay in her house for as long as possible; but as time went on it was clear that she wasn’t able to cope – with the stairs and the cat and the business of life.   As time went on and she became more frail, the doctors said ‘she needs round the clock support’. So we looked at all the different homes that were available and chose …Read More

Gory Glory

By January 20, 2014 Blog

Here’s a question.  If I’m a Christian then why do I feel so messed-up? Isn’t Jesus supposed to come in and deal with the bad?  And if it doesn’t happen instantly,well HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE? Isn’t the Christian life about getting better?  And in the meantime, what am I supposed to do with all my stuff?  I’ve been a Christian now for years. By this stage I should be jumping the toadstools of suffering and going straight to the …Read More