Am I Really Saved?

By July 31, 2014 Blog

I made a decision when I was younger, but I don’t feel the same buzz I used to I never consciously ‘prayed the prayer’: I just always believed Other Christians seem to find trusting Jesus much easier than me I struggle with X: can I still be a Christian? I’ve never had an experience of God like I hear other people say they have My life didn’t really change when I trusted in Jesus: I’d been going to church anyway …Read More

Being Brave

By July 30, 2014 Blog

take it at step at a time: don’t look back and don’t look too far forward either don’t do it alone (no-one can) don’t expect to recover in less time than it took to get ill (God might snap His fingers, but He also might take you back over the old ground which takes time) no-one has it sorted: but the battles change – and yours will too tell people if you’re struggling: don’t wait for them to spot it, (especially …Read More

More than words

By July 29, 2014 Blog

Yesterday I was procrastinating cleaning out some old cupboards and came across part of a diary I’d written when I was 15. I had to steel myself before reading: sadly the youthful version of me is just as awkward as the adult. Plus,  this was a tricky time in my life.  I was coming out of anorexia and struggling with depression/OCD, as well as the usual stuff of a teen negotiating her body, relationships, independence and life. Some of the things …Read More

Living Unhappily

By July 28, 2014 Blog

1. Compare yourself to everyone else, but make sure you do it upwards.  Not the 98% of the population who are poorer than you, obviously. The folks that have MORE.  Their kids are nicer.  Their house is bigger. Meditate on these differences and remind yourself that ‘you deserve more’. Talk about it to others too and think about how you can get what they have. 2. Focus on your body. This is the way to change your life: or, if you …Read More

When the Black Dog’s Howling

By July 27, 2014 Blog

It’s hard to explain depression when you haven’t had it.  I was chatting to a guy about this a few days ago. ‘Yes’ he said. ‘My wife’s found things difficult in the past but I never really got it.  I tried to be sympathetic, but I couldn’t help thinking, ‘ we’ve got things good. Why can’t you just be more positive?’ He paused.  ‘Then I was made redundant at work.  One day I just couldn’t get up.  It wasn’t just …Read More

Diamonds in the Dark

By July 24, 2014 Blog

I spend a lot of time wishing I was someone different.  Someone who doesn’t get stressed about little things, who doesn’t struggle with anxiety or depression or change.  Someone with a different past and different baggage (smaller) and a brain that’s wired up normal.   Someone who loves Christ and others with passion and boldness.  Someone who lives in the present – and steps out without fear of tomorrow. But wishing doesn’t change me.  And wishing means I miss what …Read More

Competing with Church

By July 23, 2014 Blog

Interesting… From The Guardian A letter to My husband, who ‘found God’: You weren’t religious when we met and married 10 years ago. Your Catholic upbringing and strict schooling had understandably put you off. I don’t have a spiritual bone in my body, preferring to believe that people can be kind and help each other, without the church and its many downsides. But then you started secretly reading and thinking, and didn’t talk to me about it. You started going …Read More

Wisdom Wanted

By July 22, 2014 Blog

Can I pick your brains? I’ve been approached by a features writer for some UK women’s magazines. (Works like this: you know those ‘true life stories’ you read in magazines in the doctor’s waiting room? – well, often someone from an external news agency sources and writes them, and then they take part of the fee and part of it goes to the person whose story it is). Anyway, they’re interested in covering my eating disorder/recovery stuff and then I …Read More

Headlines and bylines

By July 21, 2014 Blog

I was reading recently, that’s there sometimes friction on newspapers between the foreign and domestic correspondents. Foreign reporters cover the news on a global scale: wars, famine, genocide – right on their doorstep. But they have to compete for space on the page with the (slightly duller) home news: duck races, local elections and, (a recent Eastbourne headline): ‘Vicious seagull stole my chips’. There can be parallels with our Christian lives – or at least mine. Too often the headlines …Read More

Experience, but not answers.

By July 20, 2014 Blog

This afternoon I’m hoping to chat with a girl who’s in the midst of anorexia and is being treated at an in-patient unit.  Her family got in touch and suggested we talk, but she’s not too sure – and whilst I can understand her family’s concerns, I can understand hers too. It’s a bit like when you’re younger and you’re paired off with someone who’s the same age – everyone expects you will be friends.  Or at church sometimes, when we …Read More