The Big Guns: Addiction. Despair. Porn. Self-harm. Alcohol. Faithlessness. Doubt. Anger. Promiscuity. Stuff a church-goer shouldn’t even think about, let alone do.
Things you repent of: but can’t quite get past. Old scabs that keep breaking open.
And yes, you know that Jesus came for sinners. But there’s sin and there’s Sin. Let’s say He does forgive you for something medium-sized. What if you do it again? And again? Does He still want you back? Or is there a point where He says, ‘Sorry love, but you’re taking the mickey now. Let’s chat when you’re doing better’.
There are not two camps of Christians: good ones and bad. There are not two grades of sin: forgivable and er – not so sure. There is no limit on the number of times we can go back to the Cross. There are no bounds to Christ’s love.
Jesus didn’t go to the cross to improve the texture of our scones: or the width of our smiles. He went because the depth of our sin means that God Himself has to die. That’s some sin. But it’s in us all.
So. Don’t waste time beating yourself up or looking for refuge in other things. Don’t say ‘I’ve stuffed up now, so I may as well keep going’. Don’t compare yourself with other people. Don’t listen to the enemy’s lies. And don’t try to carry this yourself.
Jesus comes for people just like us. His love has no limits. And the cross is always bigger than our biggest mistakes.