Fighting Corona-Brain

By March 17, 2020 Blog

Slice me open and I bleed anxiety. I always have. I grew up in 80s/90s Northern Ireland; a place riven by chaos and conflict. If fear was a contagion, back then, we were all infected. At the same time, the headlines (those I remember) were full of the AIDS epidemic — a terrifying and fatal disease with no cure. My child-sized skull echoed with warnings: you can’t be too careful. You can’t be too safe. Aged 13, I developed anorexia. …Read More

Living by Doubt

By July 20, 2017 Blog

Don’t listen to yourself. You are not the best judge of how you’re doing.  In fact, it’s most likely that you are the worst. I think, ‘I’m doing fine,” when I’m not.  I believe that I’m “hopeless and rubbish,” when I’m loved and chosen by God and filled by his Holy Spirit. I assume that, “I’ll never succeed so I’d better give up…” when true glory isn’t winning, but stepping out and stumbling on. There are a thousand reasons I …Read More

To keep the faith, doubt your doubt

By December 14, 2016 Blog

One of the hardest things about doubt is admitting it’s there. Like inviting a flood; if I don’t believe this, then what about this and this and this?  Does God hear my prayers? Does He care?  Is He even there? It’s all well and good if you’re a self-proclaimed atheist.  In this situation, the only way is up.  But what if you’re the leader of a home group?  What if you teach the children Sunday school? What if you’re employed …Read More

Is it ok to ask some questions..?

By October 16, 2013 Blog

You’re a Christian.  But you struggle. … You know it’s ok to battle with some things: odd fibs or slip ups.  Not praying enough for missionaries. Watching Something You Shouldn’t – provided you never do it again. But what if you do?  Is there is a limit to God’s grace?  A point at which He says, ‘Sorry, but I’m done.   Deal with your addiction. Tear out your pride. Stamp out this idol. Move on – and come back when you’re …Read More

Conversion? Experience?

By October 13, 2013 Blog

This morning I gave my testimony.  I talked about meeting Jesus when I was in a very dark place. And halfway though, someone stopped me and asked, ‘what do you mean, you ‘met Jesus?’ I was flustered.  Thrown off-course. ‘Well,’ I said, ‘I met Him in the Bible.  I’d thought of Him as being Big and far-off, but not Jesus the man – the person, who wants relationship. But when I read Revelation 5, I saw Him for who He …Read More

Desperate Faith

By October 9, 2013 Blog

What does faith look like? Easy trust? Absolute confidence in the Father’s love? A sense of belonging at church? A smiley face, even in the toughest times? Unwavering, unquenchable belief? Knowledge of the appropriate Scriptures for every situation? … Or maybe, maybe it’s desperation: “A large crowd followed and pressed around Jesus.  And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years. She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors and had spent …Read More

Faith and Doubt

By September 18, 2013 Blog

From Glen’s daily devotional: The King’s English … Mark 9:24 is the confession of all weak and failing Christians – which means all Christians: “Lord I believe, help my unbelief!” They are the words of a father seeking deliverance for his son who is oppressed by a spirit.  He tells Jesus, ‘It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill him. But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.’ ‘“If you can”?’ said Jesus. ‘Everything is …Read More

Another Break-In

By June 24, 2013 Blog

Recently I’ve had the guest from hell.  Bloke by the name of Doubt. Big and mean and smells of smoke. Can’t keep his hands to himself, even though he knows I’m married. ‘You don’t belong with that Husband’ he says.  ‘You’re junk, like me’. I tell him where to go.  But even when I board up the doors, he seeks me out and breaks them down. At night I can hear him – scratching. Sometimes he retreats: but he rarely …Read More

The F Word [Guest Post by Glen]

By June 13, 2013 Blog

The Christian life is all about ‘having faith’, right? That seems pretty basic.  After all… God so loved the world He gave His only begotten Son so that the very least you can do is drum up some kind of belief in return. That’s Christianity 101, isn’t it?  We’re saved by faith – which means we’re given something called “salvation” (or “a relationship with God”) when we offer up something called “trust”.  God’s job is giving us a raft of …Read More

The Real Thing

By April 9, 2013 Blog

Sometimes I wonder if I’m really a Christian.  I don’t always feel like one –  and I’m not sure I look like one either. Do real Christians feel the way I sometimes do? Scared and confused and ashamed and – lost? Do they pray and wonder: is He listening? Does He care? Am I dialling the right number? Saying the right words? Am I doing the right things? Or even in the right place? Sometimes I wonder – have other …Read More